The Importance of Eating Together
Why should we eat dinner together more often?
Most American families are starved for time to spend together, and dinner may be the only time of the day when we can reconnect, leaving behind our individual pursuits like playing video games, emailing and doing homework. Dinner is a time to relax, recharge, laugh, tell stories and catch up on the day’s ups and downs, while developing a sense of who we are as a family.
Most American families are starved for time to spend together, and dinner may be the only time of the day when we can reconnect, leaving behind our individual pursuits like playing video games, emailing and doing homework. Dinner is a time to relax, recharge, laugh, tell stories and catch up on the day’s ups and downs, while developing a sense of who we are as a family.
Do family dinners have any scientific benefits?
Over the past 15 years researchers have confirmed what parents have known for a long time: sharing a family meal is good for the spirit, the brain and the health of all family members. Recent studies link regular family dinners with many behaviors that parents pray for: lower rates of substance abuse, teen pregnancy and depression, as well as higher grade-point averages and self-esteem. Studies also indicate that dinner conversation is a more potent vocabulary-booster than reading, and the stories told around the kitchen table help our children build resilience. The icing on the cake is that regular family meals also lower the rates of obesity and eating disorders in children and adolescents. What else can families do that takes only about an hour a day and packs such a punch?
Over the past 15 years researchers have confirmed what parents have known for a long time: sharing a family meal is good for the spirit, the brain and the health of all family members. Recent studies link regular family dinners with many behaviors that parents pray for: lower rates of substance abuse, teen pregnancy and depression, as well as higher grade-point averages and self-esteem. Studies also indicate that dinner conversation is a more potent vocabulary-booster than reading, and the stories told around the kitchen table help our children build resilience. The icing on the cake is that regular family meals also lower the rates of obesity and eating disorders in children and adolescents. What else can families do that takes only about an hour a day and packs such a punch?
Finding Time
How many nights a week should we try to eat dinner together?
Researchers find that families who eat dinner together five nights a week reap great benefits, but there is no magic number, nor is dinner inherently preferable to other meals. If your family finds breakfast or weekend lunches easier meals for a gathering, then these could also “count.”
Researchers find that families who eat dinner together five nights a week reap great benefits, but there is no magic number, nor is dinner inherently preferable to other meals. If your family finds breakfast or weekend lunches easier meals for a gathering, then these could also “count.”
We’re just so busy. How can we find the time to cook and eat together?
Time is certainly one of the biggest obstacles to families gathering for dinner. One good strategy is to cook a big batch of soup or a double batch of a casserole over the weekend, and then freeze some to make weekday dinners easier. Some meals can be thrown together quickly with help from store-bought ingredients, like pre-cut veggies, or a pre-made pizza dough. There are also many recipes that take less than 15 minutes. Please see the Food section of our website for ideas.
Time is certainly one of the biggest obstacles to families gathering for dinner. One good strategy is to cook a big batch of soup or a double batch of a casserole over the weekend, and then freeze some to make weekday dinners easier. Some meals can be thrown together quickly with help from store-bought ingredients, like pre-cut veggies, or a pre-made pizza dough. There are also many recipes that take less than 15 minutes. Please see the Food section of our website for ideas.
If you think of family dinner as a time to nourish your family, prevent all kinds of problems, increase your children’s cognitive abilities, and provide pleasure and fun that they can build on for the rest of their lives, a nightly meal is an efficient use of time.
Is it wrong to eat dinner in front of the television?
Making a steady diet of eating family dinners in front of the TV would certainly interfere with the pleasures and benefits of conversation. Researchers have found that meals eaten in front of the TV do not carry the same mental health benefits as those eaten “unplugged.” Certainly, it would be fine occasionally to watch a special program while eating a family meal. In addition, talking about a program as a family could provide benefits as well.
Making a steady diet of eating family dinners in front of the TV would certainly interfere with the pleasures and benefits of conversation. Researchers have found that meals eaten in front of the TV do not carry the same mental health benefits as those eaten “unplugged.” Certainly, it would be fine occasionally to watch a special program while eating a family meal. In addition, talking about a program as a family could provide benefits as well.
Food and Cooking
As long as we sit together and eat, does it really matter what we’re eating?
I think it’s hard to argue with the idea that feeding your family nutritious food is a good idea! This not only makes your children healthier as they grow right now, but it encourages healthy eating once they are living on their own. Some families enjoy experimenting with different menus, others like keeping a routine so that Monday night is for pasta, Tuesday for tortillas and so on. Some children like to share in the menu planning and the cooking, so the food becomes a central part of the family’s identity. For other families, the food is really secondary to other aspects of the meal, like the conversation.
I think it’s hard to argue with the idea that feeding your family nutritious food is a good idea! This not only makes your children healthier as they grow right now, but it encourages healthy eating once they are living on their own. Some families enjoy experimenting with different menus, others like keeping a routine so that Monday night is for pasta, Tuesday for tortillas and so on. Some children like to share in the menu planning and the cooking, so the food becomes a central part of the family’s identity. For other families, the food is really secondary to other aspects of the meal, like the conversation.
How much help should I reasonably expect from my family in preparing dinner? In cleaning up? Do I have to do this all myself?
Most children like to help and should be encouraged to do so. The trick is figuring out which tasks are developmentally right for your child. Even young children can be asked to sprinkle a seasoning, stir a stew, or rinse vegetables. Elementary-aged kids can set and clear the table, pour the drinks and be involved in some food preparation.
Most children like to help and should be encouraged to do so. The trick is figuring out which tasks are developmentally right for your child. Even young children can be asked to sprinkle a seasoning, stir a stew, or rinse vegetables. Elementary-aged kids can set and clear the table, pour the drinks and be involved in some food preparation.
Many adolescents view cooking as an avenue of self-expression and may relish the idea of making a meal or a portion of a meal. Sharing in all the tasks of dinner—grocery shopping, menu planning, cooking, serving and cleaning up—only makes this more of a family event. If someone is feeling overburdened, the roles and tasks should be reexamined and distributed more equitably. Everyone’s dinner will be enhanced by more members contributing and by no single member feeling resentful.
What types of meals should I make to get my kids more involved in dinner?
Prepare a meal that gives kids something to do. For example, my children loved to pull the basil leaves off their stems. To make a quick pesto sauce, we’d put them into a food processor with a clove of garlic, salt, Parmesan cheese and olive oil. Any meal that calls for ingredients that kids can peel, mash, or sprinkle is a good one.
Prepare a meal that gives kids something to do. For example, my children loved to pull the basil leaves off their stems. To make a quick pesto sauce, we’d put them into a food processor with a clove of garlic, salt, Parmesan cheese and olive oil. Any meal that calls for ingredients that kids can peel, mash, or sprinkle is a good one.
Simple dishes that kids can customize also encourage participation. Parents might make crepes, tacos, or even a pot of chicken rice soup, which kids can add their favorite toppings to, like chopped carrots or peppers, roasted garlic or sliced cheese.
It’s also fun to choose foods that are brightly colored, like the colors in their crayon boxes. This is eye-catching and makes dinner preparation even more interesting.
